“How Do I Expand My Social Circle In A Foreign Country?” (Podcast)

A reader who is living abroad in France is finding it difficult to meet new people. He has no desire to hang around with expats. People always revert to English when dealing with him, when he is trying to learn French. It is frustrating for him, and he wants to know if there are ways to get out of this dynamic. I offer some thoughts.

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You’ve Got The Job: Now Get In There And Do It (Podcast)

A reader asks a question. He has just been assigned to a new position of great responsibility. The previous occupant of this position was a man much older than he. Our friend feels slightly intimidated and inadequate for the new job. To complicate things, the previous holder of the position has not helped our friend, and has implied that he’s too young. Our friend asks for some advice.

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You Can’t Stampede People (Podcast)

A young woman from a conservative culture asks a relationship question. She is very fond of her boyfriend, an American man. She wants to move things in the direction of marriage, but the young man is ambivalent. He keeps putting her off. She wants to know what she can do to deal with the situation.

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Revisitations (Podcast)

We should periodically “revisit” things that once meant something to us years earlier. Every 7 to 10 years or so, we grow significantly in outlook, perspective, and attitude. Things that once meant something to us, may mean something very different to us years later. This holds true of books, movies, individuals, and many other things. To measure how far you’ve progressed, revisit old things, and see how much you’ve changed. I discuss two movies, and how my view of them has changed in the intervening decades.

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You Declare Yourself (Podcast)

Some guys think that they need to wait for some magical confluence of circumstances to exist before they can pursue their goals. The world doesn’t work like this. Sometimes you have to announce yourself, declare your purpose openly, and let your will shape the environment to your own purposes. You have to declare yourself. You’re never going to receive anyone’s permission to succeed. We use the example of Gen. Charles De Gaulle in 1940.

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Not As Bad As You Think, But Different From What You Think (Podcast)

Our minds often play tricks on us. We come to believe things are much worse than they really are. Once we get through what we’re worried about, we realize that things were not as bad as we thought–and we also realize that things ended in a way that was different from what we expected.

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“You’re Supposed To Do Something About It” (Podcast)

At the end of the movie “The Maltese Falcon,” Sam Spade explains his personal code to Mary Astor. He tells her, “When your partner is killed, you’re supposed to do something about it. It doesn’t matter what you thought of him. You’re supposed to do something about it…” But there is a larger lesson here. When problems exist, you have to do something. You have to take action to fight the problems. Running away to live a life of narcissism and selfishness is not what men do.

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